Author Topic: Little Johnny  (Read 1541 times)

Offline buck

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Little Johnny
« on: January 19, 2016, 12:25:15 PM »
The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.

Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating."

The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not 'fascinating'.”

Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.”

The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.”

Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so she called on him.

Johnny said, “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight!”

The teacher sat down and cried.
We are the storm.

Offline brycemus

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Re: Little Johnny
« Reply #1 on: January 19, 2016, 12:41:36 PM »
I am a huge fan of "Little Johnny" jokes
Corey Clark: 2016-2017 Hawkeye Hammer

Offline ViseGrip

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Re: Little Johnny
« Reply #2 on: January 19, 2016, 04:54:15 PM »
9/10
"The first lesson of economics is scarcity: There is never enough of anything to satisfy all that want it. The first lesson of politics is to disregard the first lesson of economics" -Thomas Sowell

Offline ViseGrip

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Re: Little Johnny
« Reply #3 on: January 20, 2016, 02:39:25 PM »
One day, during a lesson on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands for who could use the word 'beautiful' in the same sentence twice.

Three children raised their hands. First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it." "Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher.

She then called on little Michael. "My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully," he said. "Excellent, Michael!"

Then, the teacher asked if anyone else could use the word 'beautiful' in the same sentence twice. She waited hoping some other child would raise their hand and seeing none, she cringed and called on Little Johnny.

"Last night, at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said, 'Beautiful, just fucking beautiful!'"

Then the teacher sat down and cried.
"The first lesson of economics is scarcity: There is never enough of anything to satisfy all that want it. The first lesson of politics is to disregard the first lesson of economics" -Thomas Sowell

Offline fsgrecofolk

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Re: Little Johnny
« Reply #4 on: January 22, 2016, 06:13:34 PM »
Beautiful!

Offline buck

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Re: Little Johnny
« Reply #5 on: January 23, 2016, 07:08:46 AM »
9/10
We are the storm.